Christmas 2022
Time of the year for our annual summary. This year, we're trying something a little bit different - each member of the household here in NM has written a description of their year. Gary is acting as editor.

CAROLYN

This has been a quiet year with less stress than last year despite travel which last year was fraught with Covid. I travelled to Chicago to stay with my friend Cheryl while she had surgery on her hip (the other one) and celebrated my birthday there. Always so much fun on St. Pats. And visited with dear friends. In July I went to Britain, staying briefly in Chicago on the way there and back. I stayed in a very old house in the middle of Chester with my brother Bill and his family while we visited my Mum every day, we did some sightseeing around town and a Beatles tour in Liverpool. After they left to do more touring, I stayed with Lynda Evans who lives next door to my old house on Taliesin Avenue in Shotton. It was wonderful to spend time with her after her loss of Evan last December, visit his grave; where they lived down the coast of Wales, and also see old neighbours and friends. In September, we visited Ryan outside of Washington DC and spent some fun times with him at a climbing wall he goes to regularly and out for dinner. Gary & I spent quite a bit of time around the Capitol in DC which was weird after all the footage of January 6th and talking to eye witnesses. Pretty awful. We also went to Rehoboth Beach, staying near Ocean City and spent a glorious couple of days by the ocean so I could get my seaside fix!


Other than travel, my biggest highlight was new friends I have met through Jazzercise which I do most days. This has led to lunches and dinners out; going to local plays at a community theater and a local performance of the Messiah among other very enjoyable excursions. But mostly such a relief to be out with friends sharing our lives. The family of my lost friend, Jane, who passed away from cancer 3 years ago, also stopped by this year and we hope they come by again. Ryan visited us in February for a whole week and we had some nice quality time together and local sightseeing.

I have been very healthy except that I caught Covid right through a K95 mask at Manchester Airport during my return trip from Britain. I know who it was after the fact. But other than Gary, nobody caught my plague. I had pretty bad asthma which was alleviated by the antiviral Paxlovid. We were both pretty sick though. But nothing dangerous. I continue to nurse my arthritic knees with gel injections every six months and am nowhere bad enough for replacements as yet. But hiking is off the table. I have very much enjoyed the Israeli dance classes, our XC ski and mushing trips, and walking with Gillian in the beautiful trails behind our house. I love my summer swims in our amazing pool and our dogs which bring us all comfort and joy.

My Mum very occasionally knows who I am and is still cared for incredibly well at the same care home in North Wales. FaceTime has become more difficult and less regular. Now about twice a month instead of at least once a week. She gets frequent infections which make her more confused. She enjoyed our visit last July and we took lots of photos both with Bill and family and after they left. We knew she would not remember any of it. However, my Mum is happy and well cared for at Haulfryn and for that I am forever grateful.

Several people in Wales passed away this year - my old friend Peter Gordon, a neighbour Ken Edwards, and two family friends: Dorothy Selleck & Derick Hollins.

GILLIAN

My successes were unconventional this year, but I'm very proud of them. I found a better therapist, did trauma-specialized EMDR, two sweat lodges with my mother, worked with my doctors and labs to perfect my medications, and am consulting with sleep specialists. My hypothyroid was stabilized by the summer. I recovered from my fourth abusive long-term relationship with a pathological man. I was mistreated by several toxic people posing as my friends throughout the year, rejected them, and recovered. I overcame C-PTSD nightmares that caused sleep deprivation for over a year. I'm now very knowledgeable about sociopaths and narcissists, and try to raise awareness and dispel harmful myths. In other words, I've been battling my illnesses fiercely, and am winning the war. I'm able to get out of bed before the evening even on my worst days. I haven't experienced sleep paralysis in months! The nightmares are only occasional now. My psychiatrist and new therapist have been absolute godsends, and I wouldn't be where I am today without them. I also owe a huge thank you to my friends and family who support me during this long health crisis.

The 8-ish years of intense social isolation have been a hindrance, but I am - and continue to be - determined to combat the resultant social anxiety. I started going to Israeli folk dancing every week. I've applied to the Albuquerque Theater Guild in the hopes of making friends. Additionally, with all of these health improvements, I'm preparing to start my own business. I've realized that I won't be content with a conventional job, with a boss who may use their power to mistreat me, and hours that may aggravate my disabilities. So I intend to build a website/app that uses my meteorological and coding background to help people with travel. This is my dream job, and I'm eager to make it happen. If things go really well, I'll be doing Judo again this upcoming year.

Am I where I want to be? Well, no. At a glance I'm what parents would call a cautionary tale. I'm 34, still live with mine, and have no income yet. Yet I've accomplished more in the last few years than most people do in decades, because I was forced to. As annoyed as I get when I hear ignorant statements, (i.e. "Has she tried going outside?" "Why didn't she just leave?" "I'd never let that happen to me," "She's not really disabled, just lazy,"), I'm glad that those people are able to say them. Because it means they didn't have to face the kind of hardships I did.

My thoughts are with my close friend since middle/high school, Stefani. She was diagnosed with stage 4 kidney disease this past summer. She just had surgery to get a catheter and is preparing for dialysis. I've volunteered my kidney (as have many others). She's my age. Please pray for her.
GARY

The year began with the usual local trips to skijor with Carolyn, Gusty, and Vita. Vita no longer even pretends to run far, but she clearly enjoys playing in the snow.  She's pushing 13 at this point, which is incredibly old for a large dog. Gusty would still rather run than eat: he's 11, which is old for a dog to be mushing. So far we've not been able to find a dog to adopt who got along with all the humans and with Gusty, although we came heartbreakingly close. Carolyn and I went to DC to visit with Ryan and had the opportunity to meet with my brother and sister in law (Bruce and Flora) and join them for dinner.

In February Ryan came to stay with us. He did a lot of gaming on my old desktop computer, and we managed to do a bit of sightseeing here in NM.

I'm still working for Sandia National Labs, but looking forward to retirement.  My current supervisor makes work somewhat unpleasent. <shrug> He's neither the first bad manager I've had, nor the worst.

In April, Barry Kaye came to stay with us.  My grandmother met his grandmother off the boat at Navy Pier when she emigrated to Chicago  in 1912 or 1913. My grandmother was literally the first friend  his grandmother had in the  US. We go back a long way.

In October I entered my first mushing competition in more than half a decade.  Gusty and I competed in scootering in Flagstaff AZ, where we had a respectable finishing time, and in canicross, where we were last by a wide margin. Carolyn joined us and cheered us on. In December I finally got rid of my Honda Fit (with almost 140K miles on it) and bought a second-hand Mazda CX-5 from CarMax. I considered buying a new car, but I found the experience at the dealerships so unpleasent I changed my mind.

My shoulders convinced me to re-think my participation in sport judo. I don't know if I pulled something or aggravated some hitherto unknown arthritis in my shoulder, but I ended up in physical therapy (only one session). It took many months to heal. I may try going back just to see ... but I'm not sure. I enjoy being a student way more than being a teacher, but I'm not sure if my body can handle it.

I convinced my NM family to try out a new Israeli dance group, and everyone loves it. I'm also still dancing Balkan once most weeks, but I do that alone. Carolyn hates Balkan music and dancing. We did manage to get to the once-a-year International Folk Festival in Albuquerque.

Ryan (who is technically not part of the NM family) is still living in the DC area. He's rented a flat for his two cats, who have kindly allowed him to live there as long as he feeds & cuddles them. He's going to a climbing gym regularly and enjoying his job. He's not coming home this Christmas because he is being on-boarded a new project with IBM, but we look forward to a visit first quarter 2023.

Two people who were important to me passed away this year: Jeanne Derichs, an English teacher from high school, and Paul Armetta, a judo buddy.

Here are some pictures from this year:



Here we are looking at the petroglyphs. Petroglyphs are vandalisim that happened several hundred years ago. Today we do it with spray paint and call it tagging.


 The four of us at the petroglypfs



Here is our mandatory skijoring picture, this year from Los Alamos.

Los Alamos Skijoring




Here is a picture of Carolyn, her brother Bill, and their mum Pat.

Bill, Carolyn, and Pat




Here are 3 of us in DC.

3 in DC




Carolyn, lecturing our dogs in Flagstaff

Lyn & Dogs




And lastly, here is a picture of me in Flagstaff. 15 minutes after completing the scootering race I was racing again ... here I am after running 5K with Gusty. It's a toss up who is more exhausted.

End of race

We wish you a happy and healthy 2023. Remember, we have a spare bed and all the dog fur you could want!

Gary, Carolyn, Gillian, Ryan, Vita, Gusty